always never again

An engagement led me elsewhere this past week, into the great unknown of Apex's Chinatown bus service. Without the discounted online prices of the greyhound NYC-DC fares, trips to Philadelphia require a different kind of coach.
In the past, I've been known to compare Chinatown buses to a modern-day equivalent of riding a boxcar although I'm pretty sure that never ever cost anyone thirty dollars. Either way, these buses are a disarmingly disorganized means of traveling especially after becoming accustomed to the degradation that comes with the greyhound bus company and their employees.
Don't get me wrong-a traveler is not necessarily valued within this urine soaked bus, in fact the drivers and ticket collectors could be described as even more spirited. The key difference is that the Chinatown bus attitude is more of a disrespect that stems from indifference instead of the outright contempt you'll find from Peter Pan. It might sound like a small difference but here at the greyblog we like to pick up on these context clues.

As I sit in my seat, most passengers seem confused as to where exactly the bus is going. Remarks are made about it going to Philadelphia while others hope New York. Miraculously it goes both places while also making a stop in Baltimore. Everybody wins? There's a sweet vulnerability in watching confused adults ask questions about where a bus they've already boarded is heading. Why did the board without knowing? They resemble those children who overslept on the school bus whose driver was not attentive in checking for them. They simply believe in the fact that they will get to their destination, somehow...maybe.

My absolute favorite part of the experience was our stop in Baltimore which wasn't so much a stop in the city itself but instead the parking lot of a Buck Horn family restaurant. Here people gather on top of a mound of dirt (!!!) and wait for the bus. I can't even imagine how this specific locale was initially chosen or how people can properly eyeball which mound of dirt to congregate to if they are the first person to arrive-I can only speculate. Perhaps those from Baltimore just have an eye for these kinds of things. As our new Baltimore friends join us, the driver exits the bus for a nice relaxing smoke. He is then seen chatting away with another driver as time slowly passes. 15 minutes...still chattin! For such a disgruntled man he seemed to become quite gregarious when in the right company!

It smells like jalapenos and somehow the trip takes just as long to get to Philadelphia as it does to New York, a city which to my knowledge is two hours further north. This might have something to do with the bus going exceedingly slow which leads me to text my friend in Philadelphia that the bus is driving "as if it had a dirty diaper." This kind of slow plodding apparently leads me to make unsavory metaphors. If appreciation for Greyhound once seemed illogical, it quickly became a reality.

-m